Of The Feline Persuasion
by stalrua
Summary: "It's like she's trained to annoy." "No, it's like she's a cat." Just how did Jane and Loki come about adopting their first cat? And how will the two of them adjust to owning a pet? A light-hearted companion piece to "Drowning" and "Restored."
1. Adoption

A/N: I had a reviewer on "Restored" request a side story on Jane and Loki's cat and how it came into their lives. It wasn't something I'd really considered, but after I read that, I couldn't stop thinking about it. So – voila – here is the result! This is dedicated to the requesting reviewer known only as "Guest" – but you know who you are :)

I've also considered making this into a collection of short stories that show Jane and Loki dealing with all the funny situations that can come with owning a cat instead of just a one-shot. Because really, can you imagine Loki cleaning a litterbox? Review and let me know whether to keep it going or leave it as is.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for the cat, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**Adoption**

"_Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."_

* * *

"We should get a pet."

Jane continued to innocently swipe the dust rag over the bookshelf as if she couldn't feel the way his eyes bored into her back.

She'd had a few animals growing up, but in all the years she'd lived on her own, she'd never really considered getting her own. Responsibility over anything greater than an artificial plant wasn't exactly her forte, not with the obligations she'd had to her research and then to S.H.I.E.L.D. In recent years, however, those obligations had lessened. There was still plenty of research to be done, but it didn't consume her life the way it used to.

Which was why now was the perfect time to get a pet.

"Why?" She didn't even need to turn around to know that he was probably looking at her skeptically with a raised eyebrow. It had become his signature way of responding to anything 'Midgardian-related' that he didn't fully understand.

"I don't know… they're good companions. Lots of people have pets; it's fun to have something else around."

"I think not."

Mildly indignant at the hasty dismissal, she spun to face him and crossed her arms. Absentmindedly, she noted that he _was_ staring at her skeptically with a raised eyebrow just as she'd suspected. "Why?" She echoed his earlier question.

He methodically lowered the book he'd been reading, placed one of her old bookmarks between the pages, and set it aside. Then, in a perfect imitation of a therapist, he laced his fingers together and regarded her over the top of them. Jane would have been tempted to recommend the career if it wasn't for his title. Being the official God of Mischief didn't exactly inspire confidence in his ability to be professional.

"Why do you need something else in the house when there are already the two of us living here?"

"Well…" The problem was that there really wasn't a reason _to_ get a pet other than the fact that she just wanted one.

He regarded her silently as she fumbled for a reason. "That is not an answer, Jane." She gave him a half-hearted scowl, but when she still failed to supply a purpose, he continued again. "A pet would require attention and nourishment on a regular basis. After the novelty of it wore off, it would only be one more thing to clean up after."

"I already clean up after you."

She had to physically restrain the laugh that bubbled up at his outraged expression. "Jane, that's absurd…"

"I'm joking!" And she was. Loki was the cleanest man that she'd ever known. The man didn't so much as hang a towel crooked; much less leave socks strewn throughout the house or dirty dishes in the sink. "But still, I don't understand why you're so against it."

"I never said I was against it."

"You don't have to; it's only slightly obvious." His neutral expression was beyond frustrating. "Didn't you ever any pets when you were young?"

She pictured Loki playing with a golden retriever, but it didn't really fit; a bright and bounding dog would've been more suited to Thor. A snake? Creepy crawly things freaked her out so she promptly tossed that idea. A hamster? But she couldn't really imagine Loki content with watching a rodent roll around in a plastic ball. Perhaps, a cat. Felines tended to be, for the most part, aloof and reserved which seemed to make more sense for him than anything else.

"Allowing animals to live indoors is not a common practice in the Realm Eternal."

Her vision of a young Loki playing with a kitten vanished in a puff of sullen smoke. "Well, then you were deprived as a child." That about summed it up in her mind because didn't all children have at least one pet growing up?

"I may have been many things as a child, but deprived was not one of them."

Jane decided to not even ask for any details, settling instead on one last plea. "You might enjoy it."

He stared at her blankly.

"You never know…"

Still nothing.

"Fine." Mentally, she was saying something more along the lines of 'whatever' in a teenage-esque huff. She was nothing if not determined, though. Give her some time, and Jane was positive she could wear him down. Until then, she was willing to let it drop. "I need to get some groceries. Do you feel like coming?"

* * *

Jane knew that Loki was no longer as impressed with the grocery store as the first time she'd taken him. However, even now after several visits, he still showed a small measure of appreciation at the collection of fresh fruits, vegetables, and meats around the outer aisle; although, his admiration was somewhat diminished by the disgusted face he made when reading the ingredients on the labels of products in the inner aisles.

Unlike Thor, he'd never taken to the idea of toaster pastries or pancakes.

In the end, though, it was a win-win for everything but her bank balance. When living by herself, it became really easy to fall back on frozen pizza and microwave meals; it was difficult to cook a well-rounded meal for one without eating leftovers for a whole week. Having Loki staying with her meant she could cook better meals, and his inclination for fresh fruits and vegetables meant healthier food all around.

With a basket full of groceries, they made their way back to her car. They had just finished loading everything into the backseat when she heard it – the unmistakable sound of a puppy barking. With at least a small part of her mind still focused on their discussion from earlier, she automatically turned to the sound to see a number of wire pens set up on the far end of the parking lot. Holding up her hand to block the glaring sun, she squinted to read the hand-painted sign.

PET ADOPTIONS: DISCOUNTED FEES AND FREE SPAY/NEUTER

"Oh my god." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Loki straighten and look first to her and then in the direction of her gaze.

"Jane…"

He issued the warning, but she was already walking towards the pens. With no other choice other than to remain at the car by himself, he was forced to follow. In the shade of the tents, she stopped to take in the plethora of dogs, puppies, cats, and kittens. After a moment, she felt Loki come up beside her.

"It's meant to be."

What other explanation was there for a random adoption to be going on the day they ventured out to buy groceries after talking about getting a pet?

"It is coincidence."

"It's _fate_."

At her insistence, he turned to her with a slight frown. "I thought we agreed not to take in any creatures."

Ignoring him, she knelt down and wiggled a finger through the chicken wire, smiling at the puppy that ran forward to lick it. "_We_ didn't agree to anything; I just relented for the time being. But now…"

Jane shuffled to the next pen to pet an exuberant border collie and then to the next to play with a long-haired dachshund. After plenty of barking and licking, she moved over to another set of pens that housed the cats. A large tabby and a smaller calico approached the front of the cage and alternated between sniffing at her fingers and allowing her to scratch under their chins.

She felt more than saw Loki follow to stand behind her.

"Did you plan this?"

She laughed at his suspicious tone; as if she had organized the entire situation as part of her master plan. Looking up from the grey and white kitten now cradled in her arms, she offered her most winning smile. "Nope. I told you – fate." But he only responded with another snort. "Come on…" Reaching into the pen, she picked up a fluffy black and white kitten and held it out to him. "How can you say no to this face?"

He pursed his lips. "I assume you are talking about the animal's face and not your own."

"I'll go with both, if it helps." Although his cocked eyebrow indicated that neither helped. "Seriously, just hold her."

And before he could say otherwise, she plopped the kitten into his hands which had come out reflexively. Satisfied, she sat on the ground to pull out a cat in one of the lower cages. Petting the elderly Siamese, she watched as Loki awkwardly lowered himself to sit across from her, the kitten still tranquilly curled in his cupped hands. Once on the ground, he crossed his legs and set the kitten onto his lap. No longer holding the animal, he rested his hands on his thighs, and they both watched her meander across his legs, occasionally stopping to rub against his curled fingers.

"That's adorable." Jane tried to hide her grin at the sight of the ancient god with a kitten in his lap. "She definitely likes you. Look at me, pet at me, love me…" When his eyes snapped to hers, she felt heat rush to her cheeks and clarified. "The cat, not me; that's what she's… um… saying. Don't get any ideas."

Smooth move, Jane.

Thankfully, her less-than-eloquent explanation was overlooked. Or he was just being nice by not embarrassing her further by calling attention to it. Either way was fine with her. Meanwhile, the kitten continued to move around his lap, rubbing her head into the bend of his knee only to move to his crossed ankles and knead before curling into a ball on his upper thigh.

"How is it that she happens to know the exact place to lay that will cause the most inconvenience or discomfort?" Loki regarded the kitten, head tilted comically. "It's like she's trained to annoy."

"No, it's like she's a cat. Lie on laps, knead, purr, sleep… it's what they do."

Another confused frown pulled at his brows. "If that's all they do, I hardly see the point in them." The kitten rose from her previous resting spot to place her front paws on his torso, stretching up towards his face.

"Cats are great. I really do think you'll like her if you just give her a chance." Not to mention she'd been spot on about him and felines; they really did seem to fit the mysterious god.

He stared at her and sighed deeply before looking down to the kitten once more. She was still looking up at Loki, paws lightly kneading his chest, and Jane watched as he gently rubbed one fingertip against the kitten's cheek, frown smoothing into an almost-smile at the sound of the rumbling purr that started up. Then, as if realizing what he was doing, he blinked and glanced at her suspiciously to which she dutifully pretended like she hadn't even noticed the affectionate gesture.

Face a blank slate once more, he carefully grabbed the kitten and held it out to her. "If you plan to continue insisting on getting a pet instead of abandoning the idea, I suppose this one will suffice."

She curled the purring ball of fluff into the crook of her arm. "Well don't sound too thrilled." Then, she flashed him a smirk – he couldn't fool her with his offhandedness – and stood, motioning to catch the attention of one of the workers.

Jane paid the adoption fee and silently sent a thank you to whoever was listening for the discounted costs. As it turned out, the kitten was too young to have been spayed yet and would need booster shots within the next month, so she jotted down the number for the local vet that already had the kitten's records with plans to call and make the necessary appointments. With paperwork completed, they made their way back to the car, Jane handing off the kitten to Loki once they were safely inside with the doors closed.

Without any restraints, the kitten crawled across Loki's lap and onto the console. Immediately, Jane placed her back into his lap. "Be careful to hold onto her on the way home. Sometimes, animals go kind of crazy in moving vehicles."

"Wonderful." His hands wrapped around the small form, holding her still. "And what crazy antics are typical for a cat?"

"Oh, nothing too bad. She'll probably just meow a lot and try to crawl over to the window or down to the floorboard. Just make sure she doesn't get away and everything will be fine." The last thing she needed was a tiny kitten wedging itself behind the gas or brake pedal.

The engine cranked and, after a few adjustments, she started to drive home. They now had a pet, almost like they were some sort of weird family; it was both crazy and exciting to think about. Jane knew from experience just how entertaining cats could be and couldn't wait to see how Loki would respond to the situations that would come up. How she managed to convince him to get a cat, she'd never know. But she wasn't complaining. The kitten, on the other hand, _was_ complaining. Loudly.

"I was right… she is annoying."

Jane glanced over at the whining kitten struggling futilely against Loki's hands. "She'll stop eventually." Hopefully… Jane mentally crossed her fingers. "Just consider yourself lucky if she doesn't throw up on the way home."

"What?!"


	2. The Naming Game

A/N: Thanks to everyone for the love on the first chapter! I have some ideas for future chapters, but I'm always open to new suggestions. I've already made note of some from the initial reviews. Let me know if there's anything in particular you'd like to see, and I'll try to make it happen :)

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for the cat, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**The Naming Game**

"_Calling cats tends to be a rather overrated activity… might as well call a whirlwind."_

* * *

The kitten was sprawled out, basking lazily in the sun shining through the patio doors. Too many cool days without wearing socks meant Jane knew from experience how amazing the laminate floor felt right there after being heated by the sun. She'd used that same exact spot to warm her cold toes too many times to count.

Surprisingly, their newest inhabitant had taken to Jane's house quickly. After only two days, she'd made herself completely at home. Following them around continuously? Check. Meowing for food or water or no reason at all? Check. Walking over every piece of available furniture in the house? Check. Waking them up in the early hours of the morning? Check. Yes, she'd more than fulfilled her role as the resident 'annoying cat.'

But that's still all she was – a cat.

A nameless cat.

Jane leaned back into the couch and regarded the ball of fluff, touching her fingers to her lips in thought. With an impressive yawn and stretch, the kitten blearily stood up, noticed Jane, stretched one more time for good measure, and then ambled over to the sofa. As if by command, Jane reached over and picked up the waiting feline.

"So what are we going to name her?"

The clinking of the spoon that had been coming from the kitchen ceased, followed by the barely there sound of footsteps that also paused after only a few steps. She knew what was coming next. Wait for it…

"What?"

There it was.

Turning, Jane peered over the back of the sofa and spotted Loki standing in the doorway, coffee cup in one hand and spoon in the other. He blinked slowly and offered her a blank stare. Unfazed by his lack of a helpful response, she looked back down at the kitten sitting in her lap and continued. "I've always liked Chloe, but she doesn't really look like a Chloe. Mittens and Oreo are too generic; everyone uses those for black and white cats. Sophie, maybe? No, that doesn't fit either. What do you think?"

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as he slowly entered the living room and approached. When he was seated in the nearby recliner, she finally looked to him again only to be met with his mystified expression.

"What?"

The first time, she'd been expecting his question; this time, though, she was confused. "What do you mean 'what'? She needs a name." Jane rubbed the top of the kitten's head. "We have to call her something."

He was staring at her completely baffled, like she'd suggested something completely outlandish. "She is a cat. Call her as such."

"Loki, we are not naming her Cat." If that was the best a thousand year old God of Mischief could come up with, then he was clearly out of practice. "She needs a _real_ name."

"What use does a cat have with a name?"

"Well, I don't think you'd like it very much if everyone went around calling you Cranky?"

The insinuation finally pulled him out of his confusion and caused his brows to lower. "First, that course of action would be unwise in general. And second, I am _not_ cranky."

Fighting a grin, Jane hid her face and repositioned herself on the couch. "Well, not all the time…" At her words, his slight scowl turned into a full on frown. Sitting up, she tucked her feet beneath her, the kitten issuing a complaint when Jane moved her from the warm resting place to the expanse of couch. "All I'm saying is that we're going to have to come up with a name, so you should start thinking of ideas."

Loki's eyes lowered to observe the kitten now playing with a loose piece of thread from one of the cushions. The kitten pawed at the string, knocking it from side to side; rolling onto her back, she let it fall over her face and bit at it, chewing more air than fabric. Reaching out, Jane tickled at her exposed belly. Immediately, the kitten abandoned the string to attack Jane's hand, little teeth nibbling at her knuckles and back legs kicking against her palm. When Jane tried to withdraw her hand only for the kitten to pounce, she couldn't help but laugh.

"She's feisty."

"For the little time that she is awake each day." She glanced over to Loki who was now leaning forward, resting his forearms on his knees. It looked casual enough, but she had the sneaking suspicion it was only so he could watch them play. "She sleeps more than Volstagg after a night of celebration."

Jane only vaguely recalled the red-haired member of the Warriors Three. She'd only seen him for less than a day so she couldn't pretend to know anything about him, but she more than understood Loki's meaning. A person didn't go to college without experiencing at least one day that consisted only of sleeping after a wild night.

"Cats always sleep a lot. But then, what else is there for them to do?"

"Once again, I insist that there is little point in them." He offered her a brief smirk. "Do they not hunt insects or rodents?"

"Yes, but if there are enough bugs or mice in my house for her to constantly be chasing them, we have a bigger problem on our hands."

The kitten's fascination with Jane's hand had waned, and she now wandered down the length of the couch towards Loki. Crawling onto the armrest, she balanced precariously on the edge and leaned out. When Loki refused to aid her in crossing the distance from the couch to his knee, she mewed pathetically and stalked the length of the armrest.

"She wants to get to you."

"I know."

The kitten returned to her original spot and leaned towards Loki once more. "So pick her up." Jane tried not to sound too condescending, even though her mind was adding a childish 'duh' to the end of her statement.

"I do not wish to."

"Well, that's rude." Getting an idea, Jane reached over to the end table. "You can't ignore her forever, you know." Both Loki and the kitten looked to her when she ripped a page from an old magazine and crumpled it into a ball.

"I can try."

"Mmhmm."

It was a sarcastic agreement and they both knew it, but Loki deigned not to say anything, just leveled her with a stern look. Jane's only response to his silence, however, was to toss the paper ball onto the floor and laugh at how the kitten jumped down to bat it around the room. They watched as the ball rolled back and forth across the room, kitten always close behind and skidding wildly across the slick floor.

"You can't tell me she's not cute."

He leaned over the side of the recliner to observe the kitten fetching the ball out from under the piece of furniture. "I can tell you that she is not ugly."

Jane chuckled at his continued denial. "I've heard that animals tend to gravitate towards the people that don't want anything to do with them, like wearing them down is some sort of game. So really, you're fighting a losing battle pretending not to like her." He opened his mouth, but she cut off any response he might have had. "But we're getting off track; she still needs a name."

Loki's eyes followed the kitten around the room. "Spot." Bewildered, Jane looked at him. "Is that not a common name for Midgardian pets?"

"Yeah… um… but she doesn't have any spots."

"There is one on her front leg."

"We're not naming her Spot." With a slight shake of her head – really, Cat and Spot? – she decided to move on. "How about Olivia?"

"No."

The ball bounced against Loki's foot, and the kitten took a moment to attack a stray shoelace before chasing after it once more. "Why not?"

"It is too plain."

"Plainer than Spot?"

He was in the middle of giving her a pointed look when the kitten raced across the room and leaped onto his pant leg. Startled, he jerked, but the kitten held fast, front claws latched into the fabric just below his knee and back legs dangling limply.

"Heita." Jane didn't know if she misheard him or if what he said really was another language. She looked to him for clarification, and although he didn't return her gaze, he responded. "It is Old Norse meaning promise."

"I didn't know you knew Old Norse."

There were, undoubtedly, many things she didn't know about Loki, but that was another point. Jane watched Loki who continued to watch the kitten.

"Am I not one of your supposed mythical Nordic gods?"

"Well yeah, but Old Norse was spoken by humans, and you don't…" He finally lifted his eyes to hers, but only to give her another stern look. "Nevermind." Regrouping, she backtracked to an earlier point in the conversation. "Heita sounds a little strange… why choose something that means a promise."

She knew there must be some reasoning behind it; nothing Loki did was without a purpose. From the way he arranged his clothes in the dresser drawer – he said it was easier to find them in the darkened room while she still slept – to how he decided to place the kitten's food and water dishes near the dinette – he claimed the kitten would be more inclined to eat her own food instead of begging for scraps from the table… there was always a cause.

So what was the reason for the Old Norse name?

With an exaggerated sigh, he pried the kitten from his pant leg and set her on the floor. "We will name her Heita because it will be a constant reminder that I am promising not to dispose of her when she becomes annoying."

Jane blinked.

Was it normal for her to think that his promise was almost sweet? Maybe she should be worried that he'd even considered killing the kitten. Or was the whole statement nothing more than a hollow threat as he continued to play hard to get? Still…

"I still like Olivia better, but if that's the only way you'll not kill her, I guess there's no choice." She noticed how he glanced up at her facetious words, but she continued to stare at the kitten sitting on the floor between them. "Heita it is."


	3. Feeding Frenzy

A/N: I'm going to be out of town for a while and won't be able to post anything so you all get a special double update to make up for my absence. Enjoy!

Also, this is just too much fun to write. I now watch my cats even closer to pick up on any quirky thing they do so I can write about it here.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for Heita, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**Feeding Frenzy**

"_Cats gravitate to kitchens like rocks gravitate to gravity."_

* * *

"Jane, make her stop."

With what must have been the fourth or fifth sigh within the past hour alone, Jane lowered the graphs she'd been studying and looked over the top of the computer. Loki stood near the far wall, hands clasped behind his back, caught in a staring match with Heita who was perched on the back of the couch, meowing pleadingly.

"I can't." She almost mentioned that it wasn't like she could put a muzzle on the kitten, but decided against it since it would probably only give Loki ideas. "She's just hungry. You'd be complaining, too, if you had to go without eating."

"I can go without a meal for a significantly longer amount of time."

"Really?" Jane resumed her perusal of the graph, jotting down a few notes. "Because I see you eat three times a day with me."

He sniffed, snootily. "That is because I choose to do so, not because I am required."

_Well, excuse me._

With an inward eye roll, she ignored the stare down happening across the room and tried to focus – yet again – on her research. It was difficult, though; she couldn't deny it. Especially with the way Heita had been meowing constantly for the past hour.

At first, Loki had suggested putting her outside. The downpour that started up moments later, though, ended that line of thought; that, and the fact that Jane was always worried about some wild animal snatching her up. Then, they had decided to close her up in the spare room. But that hadn't lasted long either. Both Jane and Loki had been simultaneously shocked and amazed by the veritable wailing that Heita had started up. So, in the end, they'd let her go free, and she'd contented herself with following them and meowing at a level that was still annoying but more tolerable than the cacophony from before.

The lines on the page blurred, and Jane blinked hard to bring them back into focus. If she could only concentrate… then, she felt eyes on her. Slowly, she looked up to find Loki staring at her expectantly.

"What?"

"So are you going to feed her?"

Jane sighed again. "We can't. The vet said she can't have anything to eat after six o'clock the night before and nothing to drink after ten. So you…" She gave him a sickeningly sweet – and fake – smile. "Will just have to deal with it."

Bright and early the following morning, they were going to drop Heita off at the vet to get the last of her booster shots and get spayed. There weren't many stray cats in the area, but Jane didn't want to put it off and suddenly become a grandmother. It had seemed fairly simple – no food or water, drop her off by nine, and pick her up the following morning. But neither of them had expected to content with Heita's apparently ravenous stomach.

She didn't look up when she heard the television come on.

But the hungry kitten continued to meow.

She didn't look up when Loki issued a frustrated groan.

But the hungry kitten continued to meow.

She didn't look up when the television volume increased to a near-deafening level.

But the hungry kitten continued to meow… even louder.

"Jane, this is absurd. How can such an insignificant little creature be so annoying? It defies logic. Is there nothing that can be done? I do not see the problem with me preventing her from making any sounds…" One of Loki's earlier suggestions was to use his magic to keep her quiet, but Jane had instantly turned that idea down as well. She was a scientist, not a sorcerer; who knew what kind of effect magic had on a living creature. It was likely nothing would go wrong, but what if the magic had some kind of latent effect on the surgery? "Something must be done."

Giving up on the possibility of getting any work down between either of her housemates' complaining, Jane set down the graphs and rolled the chair to the side of the desk. If she weren't already at her wits' end, she would have laughed at Loki's frazzled expression.

"There's nothing we can do."

He glared at her – why _her_ when she was only following orders? – for a moment before looking back to whatever Mythbusters was attempting to prove or disprove. "I should have known better than to promise…" But his words trailed off into a disgruntled mutter she couldn't understand. The beginning was enough to give her an idea of what he meant, though.

"They always say hindsight's twenty-twenty." Her comment may or may not have come out a little more snidely than she'd anticipated.

And after one last flick of his eyes to her, Loki proceeded to pretend to ignore both Jane and the cat, even though the slight tick in his jaw continued to give away his frustration. Easing back around the desk, Jane picked up her paperwork hesitantly.

If the pattern continued, she could expect another interruption soon…

Any second now…

But one last glance around the computer screen revealed Loki glaring at Heita who he held out in front of him. At the sight, Jane's heart sped up. He wouldn't really kill her, would he? She was just about to ask him what he was doing when she heard him speak lowly.

"Heita, you will stop this incessant noise."

He sounded stern but completely in control and looked exactly like Jane's father had when he would scold her. It was… not what she was expecting in the least. The kitten emitted one more soft meow to which he warned again.

"Heita…"

And what was even more unexpected was the way the kitten went completely quiet.

Somewhat shocked, Jane hid her face behind the computer and decided not to question the situation and just be thankful that the room was now silent. So with a quiet exhale, she relaxed. Mythbusters was changed briefly – _very_ briefly – to a cartoon before settling on some documentary on the History Channel. With the relaxing drone of professionals discussing ancient artifacts in the background, Jane was able to delve back into her work.

Focused on cross-referencing equations and charts and notes, she had no idea how much time passed. When she paused to stretch, though, she realized that it was still quiet. Moving slowly, as if too quick a movement would break the spell, she peeked over the top of the screen only to see…

Loki with his eyes closed and head leaned back against the couch, and Heita curled in a ball on his lap. The fact that his fingers were still draped across the kitten's back in mid-pet did not escape her notice.

* * *

"What are they planning to do to her?"

Jane smiled apologetically at the receptionist and ignored the man beside her. "Should we pay now or tomorrow when we pick her up?"

With an immensely bored expression, the woman popped the wad of gum in her mouth. "Either way."

"As far as I am aware, Heita is not damaged so what about her needs fixing?"

The receptionist arched an eyebrow, causing Jane to laugh nervously and shake off the fingers that tugged at her sleeve. "If it's no trouble, I'll go ahead and take care of it now." Handing over a credit card, she waited until the lady's back was turned to confront Loki. "Will you shut it? She's going to think you're crazy."

He glanced to the receptionist. "There is nothing wrong with requesting information."

"There is when it's something every normal person knows. You couldn't have asked me what was happening when I scheduled the appointment? Or yesterday? Or _any_ time when we were _alone_?"

"No. Now explain to me what is going on."

"Later."

"Jane…"

"Stop it!"

"I refuse to leave Heita here without knowing what procedures will be performed on her."

"She's just getting spayed, Mister." They both turned to the forgotten receptionist. Numbly, Jane took back her card and signed the receipt. If she managed to keep people from realizing that Loki wasn't at all normal, it would be a miracle. "It's an operation that'll keep her from getting pregnant. And the shots are to keep her from catching diseases."

"And will it be painful?"

"We always give them anesthesia to make sure they don't feel a thing."

Jane snuck a sideways glance at Loki. After a moment's consideration, he nodded. "I suppose that is acceptable."

And it took an immense amount of willpower for Jane to not cover her face in embarrassment.

* * *

Part of dropping off Heita to be fixed included giving the veterinarian all the details of her lifestyle and diet. The man had agreed that keeping the kitten inside was probably best, especially seeing how Jane lived on the outskirts of town and had a forest at the border of her backyard; however, he'd taken issue to the generic, run-of-the-mill cat food they'd been feeding her. There was something about digestion issues and tiny teeth, and Jane had ended up walking out of the building with a list of acceptable and unacceptable features that should be in whatever cat food they chose going forward.

That was how Jane and Loki came to be standing in the aisle of Petsmart staring at all of their options.

"Why are there so many different varieties? Is not one adequate form of nourishment enough for an animal?" Eyes roaming the range of bags, Loki seemed genuinely confused.

"You know us humans." She snatched an impressively healthy looking bag off the shelf. "We like to make things complicated."

Holding out her list of do's and don'ts, she compared it to the ingredient list on the bag.

The first ingredient should be something like chicken or turkey, not just meat… chicken meal is alright but only as a secondary ingredient… no BHA or BHT preservatives… no animal digest – what the hell was that, anyway? – or by-products… no corn, corn gluten, or wheat gluten… no artificial flavors or colors… should be fortified with additional vitamins and minerals…

If they were to follow the veterinarian's list, Heita would be eating healthier than her owners, the feline equivalent of an organic vegan.

"Why does a cat need multiple flavor options? Salmon, chicken, duck… do they even taste different?"

"I don't know; I don't eat cat food."

He regarded another bag. "And what are LifeSource Bits?"

Jane replaced another rejected brand and looked at him. He stood about halfway down the aisle, leaning forward and scrutinizing the various offerings. There was something exceedingly amusing about watching Loki study bags of cat food.

"This one promises hairball control in adults while another boasts oral care. But then this one provides optimal care while another claims to be age defying." When she snickered, he turned to her with a bewildered frown. "You humans _are_ complicated. Would it not be simpler to create one brand that offers a natural, grain-free diet that works well on sensitive stomachs but still defies age and provides optimal care, hairball control, healthy development, oral care, and weight control?"

Walking over to him, she scanned the bags he'd been perusing. There _were_ a ridiculous amount of possibilities.

"We could, but all of those features wouldn't fit on the front of the bag. That's why we have to split them up."

He gave her a serious look, but she only offered a smile in return. Truthfully, she was just as overwhelmed with the choices as he was; however, it was fun to pretend she knew what she was doing. It wasn't often that she had an advantage – even if it was false – over the God of Mischief, so she decided to revel in the rare sensation of victory.

"We'll get this one." She plucked a bag from the shelf and handed it to him. Some fancy brand she'd never heard of that claimed to be rich in protein and grain-free. "It's even a kitten formula so it'll be easier on her teeth."

"How do you know Heita will like it?"

"I don't…" She narrowed her eyes playfully. "Since when are you so concerned with her well-being?" Between being just a little too curious when dropping off Heita and now trying to ensure she'd be happy with her food, he was giving himself away.

"I'm not." He'd deny it to the end, but Jane knew. His eyes shifted back to the bag of food in his hands. "Does the kitten formula taste like salmon, chicken, or duck?"

"Loki, I told you – I don't eat cat food!"


	4. A Smelly Situation

A/N: The article talked about in this chapter is very real and I was literally laughing out loud when I read it. If I ever come across it again, I'll share the link because it was hilarious. There's also a line in here that's a throwback to Avengers even though none of that happened in this AU. I'm sure all of you will spot it right away :)

I'm still out of town but managed to get a little opening to update. I should be back in town late next week, so expect the next chapter on Thursday or Friday. Until then – much love to all of you!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for Heita, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**A Smelly Situation**

"_In ancient times, cats were worshipped as gods. They have not forgotten this."_

* * *

A woman crept slowly down a dark hallway, the floorboards creaking occasionally with her movements. There was a soft thump from around the corner up ahead, and the woman slowed momentarily before resuming her slow but steady advance. One more thump sounded before the woman peeked around the corner and found the source. Shock spread across her face as she took in the sight of a girl sprawled on the floor. Cautiously, the woman stepped forward, still eyeing the motionless girl. Then, without warning, the girl raised up onto her hands and feet, back bending in an unnatural angle, and crawled towards the now-screaming woman.

And the combination of the movement with the burst of music from the television caused Jane to jump in fright, yell out, and look away.

"Honestly, woman… calm yourself."

Her eyes found his across the room for a moment – he looked at her in mock-frustration and barely contained amusement – before she threw aside the blanket she'd been cowering under and headed for the kitchen. "I can't watch this."

"It isn't real."

"That doesn't make it any less creepy." She shivered involuntarily. "If I keep watching that, I'm either going to have nightmares or not be able to sleep at all."

"We can watch something else."

"No, it's alright."

"Stay. We will find something different."

"I need to wash the dishes from supper anyway."

A grin pulled at the corners of her mouth as she walked away. Guys she'd dated in the past would have made fun of her for being afraid of scary movies. Loki, on the other hand, had offered to change the channel just to keep her there. It was the little things he did that never failed to make her smile.

She had just passed the doorway to the utility room when she stopped. "On second thought, I think I'll clean the litter box." Judging by the smell, it needed to be done. Flipping the light on, she glanced at the box in the far corner.

Yeah… it _definitely_ needed to be done.

Grabbing the broom, she swept up the pieces of stray litter that had been scattered across the floor before gathering the supplies. She pulled down the box containing all manner of things Heita-related from a shelf, bringing with it a stray cat toy that she kicked out of the way before she could trip on it, and dug out the bag of litter from a nearby cabinet. She was already kneeling in front of the box when a thought crossed her mind.

"You should help."

Nothing. She smiled in the silence following her statement. There was no way he couldn't have heard her, which meant he was either trying to figure out what to say or was planning on ignoring her completely.

"I am… busy."

Lie.

Loki was never busy.

But at least he hadn't ignored her.

It would have been easy to just let it go – she didn't _need_ his help, by any means – but it would be undoubtedly entertaining to see a thousand year old god help clean a litter box. Leaning back on her heels, she peered around the doorway only to find him still sitting in the recliner with a… was that a laser pointer? Jane watched him curiously, trying to figure out what he was up to, until a red dot appeared on the far wall only moments before a black and white ball of fur attacked it.

She'd shown him how Heita would chase after the laser dot a few days before. Now, here he was playing with it when he thought she wasn't around to see. She shook her head when his soft chuckle at the kitten's antics reached her ears.

"Yeah, that's real taxing work you're doing."

He briefly glanced to her before swinging the laser around in her direction, a skidding kitten following in frantic pursuit. "I am making use of the seventeen minutes she will be awake for the day."

Still, his flippant comment couldn't erase that she'd just seen him willingly play with Heita.

She took a mental picture of the moment and filed it away even as she insisted once again. "You should come help me."

"Were you not the one that told me I needed to pay more attention to Heita?" The dot shot across the floor, and the kitten scrambled after it. She wasn't even fazed when she bumped into the leg of a chair.

"Yeah, but her and the laser will both be there later. I'll even go upstairs and pretend I don't know how much you like her." Loki's eyes flicked to hers, but he only offered a blank stare in response to her Cheshire-like grin.

Finally, with a sigh and a click of the power button on the laser, he got up and made his way to her. Jane didn't miss the way his eyes shot down to Heita, now confused as to where her plaything had disappeared to, but she coyly looked away all the same when he looked back at her. Commenting on how much he liked Heita was a new one, so she figured it was better if she didn't push her luck.

Still kneeling on the floor, Loki towered over her even more than usual, but she was still able to get a clear view of the way his nose wrinkled in distaste at the sight of the litter box. "It stinks… horribly."

"Which is why we have to clean it." As a prince of Asgard, he probably never had to clean anything in his life so it wasn't really a surprise when he gave her what bordered on a beseeching look. Jane, however, only shook her head. "Heita's your cat, too, which means you get to help out every once in a while." She gestured to the box on top of the washing machine. "Now grab the scoop."

He sighed again – she ignored it – and then dropped to his knees beside her.

"All you do is scoop it up and throw it away. Easy."

"This is vile."

"But necessary." He warily grabbed the scoop she held out. "Your turn."

And with a disgusted look, he went to work. Watching him, Jane was absolutely sure she would never ask him to help clean the litter box again; it seemed very… beneath him. It didn't make the one time she'd be able to experience it any less amusing, though. When she was sure he wasn't going to abandon the project, she settled down beside him to organize the box of Heita's things. But the silence didn't last too long.

"The litter seems pointless."

She didn't even look away from her current mission. "Considering it absorbs liquid and controls the smell, I'd have to disagree."

"I hope when you say that it controls the smell, you mean it fails miserably."

Reaching forward, she snagged the bag of litter. "You wouldn't be saying that if you knew what it smelled like without the…" She read the words printed on the front of the bag. "Odor absorbing crystals."

"Perhaps it would do a better job at controlling the odor if Heita were a typical cat."

That finally made her look at him. "What are you talking about?" As far as Jane knew, Heita was a perfectly normal cat.

Loki paused in his actions to meet her eyes. "The other cats I have seen scratch the ground when they are finished in an attempt to… cover their…"

Jane's eyebrows rose as she suggested. "Crap?"

"I was _going_ to say waste." What exactly did he do when he was supposed to be away trying to repair the paths between the worlds? A vision of him studying the actions of cats flitted through her mind and she snorted. Loki, however, pointedly ignored her snicker. "I have noticed that Heita refuses to even try and cover her business."

It was something Jane had noticed as well. Heita would do her thing and then leave right away without even a half-hearted attempt to bury it.

"It's because she thinks she's the boss of us." She set the box aside as Loki stared at her. "The other day, I was online looking up articles on cat behavior and read one that said cats bury their poop as a natural instinct to throw other predators off their trail. So when Heita leaves it uncovered, it's a signal that she thinks she's the dominant animal."

"But _we_ were the ones that gave her a home. _We_ provide all of her needs."

"Yeah, well, cats can be kind of obstinate." As can Gods of Mischief, her mind readily supplied at his stubborn expression. "I don't think the phrase 'don't bite the hand that feeds you' applies to felines."

"So Heita truly believes herself to be the dominant being in this house?"

She merely shrugged. "That's what the writer claimed. He said that it's basically cats declaring – and I quote: No one here is bad enough to fuck with me. Enjoy my shit."

He frowned. "How very crass… and yet, apparently true." Loki glanced down at the little piles in the almost-clean litter box. "Something needs to be done about this. She cannot be allowed to think she is in charge."

"She's just a kitten."

"All the more reason to curb this line of thinking now. All things crave subjugation, and Heita is no different. She needs structure and discipline."

It was not the first time she wondered exactly what kind of father the All-Father had been to inspire such words. Sure, structure and discipline were good, but did he have to use the word _subjugate_? That made her think of conquering and overpowering and suppressing and… yeah, none of those things coincided with her view of the tiny ball of fluff that was Heita.

"We'll work on it, alright?"

Exactly how they would work on it, Jane had no idea, but Loki was apparently satisfied with her answer as he resumed the task at hand.

"Should we start by setting limits on the amount of time she's allowed to play with the laser dot?"

"Don't be silly, Jane."


	5. Always Watching

A/N: So I upped the rating for this chapter. Sorry to those of you that might not like it, but a situation like this is too good to pass up. This one is dedicated to Guest, a different anonymous reader from the one that started this story, who requested something of this nature.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for Heita, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**Always Watching**

"_The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer."_

* * *

It wasn't easy to ignore the fluffy face staring up at her, but Jane did her best.

Which was to say, she didn't ignore it at all.

After a furtive glance to ensure no one was watching, she inconspicuously allowed a piece of ground beef to fall to the ground. Oops. But not really. She also inconspicuously smiled as she watched Heita gobble it up, lick the floor a couple times, and sit to wait patiently for another piece.

"I saw that."

With a startled squeak, Jane whirled to see the resident God of Mischief leaning casually against the refrigerator.

"Saw what?"

He smirked knowingly. It was worth a try, even though she knew better than to think she could outsmart him. Turning away from him, she focused on the beef browning in the skillet. It was nice to be back in a routine.

About a week ago, she'd received an invitation from Nick Fury to travel to New York so they could better discuss some of the finer points of her research. Any other day, she probably would have insisted on going over them via phone, but when he mentioned that Tony Stark – _Tony Stark_ – was also interested in looking at her work… well, needless to say, that proverbial dangling carrot sealed the deal.

The only unfortunate aspect was that Loki couldn't go with her. They'd travelled together before, but taking him that close to S.H.I.E.L.D. was too risky. So, in the end, he'd stayed behind.

Jane would be lying if she said that she hadn't been worried about him getting into trouble while she was gone – no amount of phone calls to check in reassured her – so it was a pleasant surprise to come home to a still-standing house, a well-fed kitten, and a secretly-pleased-to-see-her Asgardian prince.

She was in the middle of stirring the beef when she felt the barest brush of fingers against her waist followed by the hard press of his body to her back. Holding in a small smile, she continued to stir, trying to ignore the way the fingertips lowered and tightened at her hips. When his breath stirred her hair, she issued a contented sigh.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you missed me."

"You were only gone for four days, Jane." But the way he was nosing her hair to the side and pressing his lips to her neck to send shivers throughout her body completely contradicted his dismissal.

"Mmhmm."

"Admittedly, they were a long four days." Which was something she readily agreed with.

"Oh, you definitely missed me."

She felt his lips form a smile against her skin. Then, without warning, the hands at her hips twisted her around and pulled her flush against his chest. "I prefer your presence over solitude." His words were so steady, so calm, but the way one of his hands threaded through her hair while the other held her firmly against him betrayed his self-control.

"Why don't you just say it?"

"Why do you need confirmation of something you should already know?"

And somewhat breathlessly – what with the combination of her heart racing due to their closeness and his confession – she rose up to catch his lips. Instantly, she felt the hand in her hair tighten and hold her still even as his head tilted to deepen the kiss. There was the distant sound of the burner being turned off and then his other hand was back. It pressed to her ribs, dragging along her side down to her hip, before curling lower and lifting her onto the countertop.

If she was thinking rationally – or at all, really – she would have been impressed with the act, considering he did everything without breaking their kiss.

In only one step, he'd moved into the space she'd vacated, pressing his hips to hers in a way that made her breath hitch. Her legs wound around his waist. And when she dragged him even more firmly against her, she felt more than heard him moan.

Suddenly, insistently, his hands gripped her waist, pulling her forward and forcing her back to arch into him. The pressure of his lips left her own only to reappear at her neck, suckling at the sensitive area beneath her ear. With a soft thump, Jane let her head fall back against the cabinets, her hands playing with the soft hair at the nape of his neck, while his mouth roamed the expanse of skin she now offered him.

It was with her head inclined, consumed by the feeling of him moving against her, that she noticed it.

"Loki…"

Fingers twitched almost imperceptibly at the sound of his name, and his breath ghosted across her skin, causing her mind to grow fuzzy at the edges. It would be so easy to sink into him, into the sensations he caused… if it weren't for the pair of wide, green eyes staring at them.

"Loki."

She shivered when his teeth caught her earlobe. She shivered again when his seductively whispered words caressed her ear. "You have never been so inclined to say my name before."

That was because they had never been doing anything like this in the presence of another living thing. Heita, apparently indignant at being ignored for other more pleasurable activities, had jumped onto the counter and now sat no more than ten feet away. Watching them.

"Perhaps you missed me as well."

When his fingers abandoned her waist to ease under the hem of her shirt, Jane closed her eyes. But even in the darkness, she could feel it… their silent, judgmental audience. As much as her body desired what was happening – more like demanded it – her mind couldn't ignore the black and white kitten.

"Loki."

The insistence in her tone and her slight tug on his hair finally made him stop. He didn't pull away completely, only enough to meet her eyes with a mildly frustrated expression, displeased at being interrupted.

"What?"

However, Jane looked pointedly at Heita. "She's watching us."

There was a long moment where he stared at her in bewilderment before he looked to the kitten. When he didn't say anything, she snuck a sideways glance that revealed him to be scowling at Heita through narrowed eyes. Then, he turned back to her.

"She is a cat, Jane."

"But…" But it was incredibly hard to think with the way his fingers traced the line of her ribs around to her back and up to the clasp of her bra. And all arguments seemed invalid when his mouth found the hollow of her neck once more and she elicited a breathy gasp. Loki was right. Heita was just a cat; it was no big deal. Feeling resigned, she dipped her own head to seek his lips while her legs tightened around him once more. The motion brought forth another groan, his hips bucking against her insistently.

Every sense felt heightened and exaggerated, like her very nerves were electrified or on fire. It was as if she were being consumed with fire… although with the feeling of his fingers pushing aside the fabric of her bra and his tongue dancing with hers and him steadily rocking against her, she couldn't really bring herself to care.

It made her feel all the more light-headed when he pulled her impossibly closer.

He leaned into her to the point there was no doubting exactly how much he'd missed her. But when she lowered a hand to brace herself against the countertop and felt warm fur instead of cool marble, she yelped and jerked without thinking. Her body slipped sideways off the counter and her hand came up so fast, she nearly hit Loki in the face.

"What the hell?!"

Her legs struggled to support her weight after he'd effectively turned them to mush, but with his help, she managed to stand. And when she looked down, she saw that Heita no longer sat on the far side of the countertop but right beside where Jane had been moments before.

Nope.

Not happening.

"I can't do this." Jane eased out of the arms still curled around her waist. "It's too weird with her watching."

If she hadn't been so out of sorts with the situation, she would have laughed at the way Loki's expression landed somewhere between shocked and crestfallen. He recovered quickly, though, approaching her with an easy swagger. "There is a perfectly adequate room with a door that a cat cannot breach upstairs. Might I suggest we adjourn there?"

"Look at her… just… watching. It's creepy." Heita blinked steadily at Jane who shook her head. "She's completely ruined the mood." There was just something about a kitten watching her get into the mood with Loki that instantly got her out of the mood.

"I am sure I could persuade you once we were alone." The hungry expression in his eyes spoke of dark promises and breathless sighs and twisted sheets, all of which sent an involuntary shiver through her.

"She'll eat the hamburger meat, though."

With a small motion, a lid appeared on top of the skillet.

"She'd just knock it down if she wanted it that bad."

Another gesture had the skillet now placed on top of the refrigerator.

"Cats are good at figuring out ways to get to things they shouldn't."

With a sharp wave of his hand, the skillet disappeared altogether.

Jane scanned the kitchen. "Where did you put it? We need that for tacos." When she stepped to the side to look around him, though, he caught her upper arms.

"I am not hungry for tacos."

"But everything's already out… the lettuce, tomatoes, cheese…"

"Jane…"

"It won't take us long to eat." She reached up to slide a single fingertip down his chest. "Then we can go upstairs." When his jaw clenched in restraint, she had to work hard to fight a grin. Men – whether they were human, Jotun, or Asgardian – were all the same. "You've waited four days… what's another twenty minutes?"

Before he could stop her, she stepped away, put Heita back on the floor, and returned to the stove. Once there, she looked back at him expectantly. He appeared to consider the situation for a moment, jaw still clenching and unclenching, but then with another wave of his hand – and something that sounded suspiciously like him muttering '_ten minutes'_ – the skillet appeared on the stove with the meat already fully browned.

"Well, that's convenient."

Jane added the taco seasoning, spooned everything into bowls that would fit easier on the small dinette, and then, stepping over Heita who was weaving herself in and out of her legs, moved all the toppings to the table. On the last trip with the meat, she didn't fail to notice the slight glare Loki shot Heita or the jaunty gait to the kitten's steps as she pranced by him.

Almost as if she knew exactly what she'd done and was now flaunting a job well done.


	6. Escape Plan

A/N: This chapter is dedicated to tazdevil68 from a review back on chapter three.

And 'This Guest' wanted to know what type of cat Heita is. To be honest, I modeled her after one of my own cats. The breed is called Norwegian Forest Cat and how fitting that it originated in Norway :) So if you want to get an idea of what Heita looks like, just search for black and white Norwegian Forest Cats and enjoy!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for Heita, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**Escape Plan**

"_Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later."_

* * *

Jane meandered through the living room for the third time that morning. And for the third time that morning, she asked Loki to move his feet so she could look under the armchair he sat in.

The first time he'd stood and went to the kitchen for a drink while she peeked through the dust and cobwebs that had accumulated beneath the piece of furniture. The second time, he'd arched an eyebrow at her but had obligingly lifted his feet. The third time, he snapped shut the book he'd been absorbed in to look at her exasperatingly.

"Is there a purpose to you insisting on looking beneath my chair every thirty minutes?"

Yes… but in all honesty, she preferred not to say.

"Will you just move for a second?"

She focused on a few clumps of dust on floor that had been stirred up during her earlier movement of the chair. She focused on the Loki's feet and how strange it was to see him wearing socks instead of his trademark boots. She focused on the pieces of fur that clung to the edge of the furniture.

Really, she focused on anything except the way his eyes bored into hers.

"Why?" And the tone of his voice insisted that he would not be ignored. Even if she was brave enough to brush off his question, the way he stood up – slowly, carefully, intimidatingly – had her finally meeting his gaze with her own nervous one.

"I can't find Heita."

"You lost her?"

The worried feeling she'd been trying to stifle for the past hour bubbled up and had her wringing her hands anxiously. "I didn't _lose_ her… I just can't find her." Which didn't make it sound any better.

"The majority of the nine realms would consider that losing her."

"Whatever." She mentally berated herself for sounding like she was ten, but frowned at his judgmental tone nonetheless. "Have you seen her?"

"No."

That was it? A simple 'no'? A little expounding on when last he saw Heita would have been nice; maybe an offer to help look for her. However, it was unlike Loki to simply offer up information without her asking so she couldn't really fault him. Even still… "Well, aren't you helpful?"

"_I_ am not that one that lost our pet." As if she didn't feel guilty enough.

"I didn't lose her! She's just been… misplaced."

"She is not a coffee cup, Jane."

She leveled him with a glare – did he have to look so insufferably haughty? – before turning to face the opposite direction. "Alright, let's just think about this." Pressing her fingers to her lips, she mentally retraced her steps. "We woke up… I went to the kitchen and made breakfast while you made coffee… we ate and cleaned up… I went upstairs to wash clothes and you…" She paused. "What did you do?"

"I dispatched of a bothersome black and white issue." She faltered, throwing a suspicious glance at him over her shoulder, and he smirked at her obvious mistrust. "Honestly, woman… I retrieved your newspaper and read."

Innocent enough. And yet, Heita was missing.

Wait…

She whirled back around to face him. "Did you say you got the newspaper?"

"Yes."

"So you went outside?"

"That is typically where they leave it." If she hadn't been so absorbed in her train of thought, she would've felt offended at the way he drawled the words out, as if he were speaking to a particularly slow child.

For the past week, Heita had made several attempts at escaping outside whenever Jane or Loki had left the house. If she didn't live so much on the outskirts of town, it wouldn't bother her so much, but with a forest in her backyard and all manner of wild animals roaming through the neighborhood, it did bother her. Heita may have been edging more towards being an adolescent now in cat years, but she was still small and easily killed. It would be a simple matter for her to be snatched up by an eagle.

Now moving well past concerned and more towards alarmed, Jane rushed across the living room and out the front door. Immediately, she was scanning the porch, the driveway, and the yard for any hint of black and white fur. When she found none, she began calling out the kitten's name.

"You think she got out?"

A quick look revealed Loki to have shadowed her outside. "She's been trying to sneak out for a while now. I've been over every inch of the house three times now; I know she's not in there. So if she's not inside, she must be outside."

Jane and Loki walked the perimeter of the yard then zigzagged across it for good measure. She looked everywhere she could think of. Under the car, amidst the bushes, in the tall grass beyond the yard… nothing. Desperate, she sent Loki to check the backyard in case Heita had somehow managed to climb over the fence while she made another sweep of the front. She was nearing the main highway at the front of the lawn when she noticed the group of men working on the power lines across the road.

"Have you seen a kitten running around?"

All of the men turned to look at her and then returned to their job, pointedly ignoring her. Jerks. Her nose wrinkled in distaste at their rudeness, but then she noticed one younger man near the rear of the group still staring at her. He inclined his head slightly, and Jane frowned. With no idea what he meant, she explained further.

"She's black and white with long fur."

And it was just as he pointed to a spot above her head that she heard the faint meow.

There was no telling how long she stood there shielding her eyes from the glaring sun while she craned her head, but eventually she heard Loki approaching. He stopped near her shoulder, eyeing the men still working across the road with disinterest.

"She is not in the backyard."

"I know." And when he looked to her questioningly, she merely pointed upwards. "Can you climb trees?"

Washington was full of forests which meant Jane's front yard was graced with quite a few trees. There were five cedar trees along the very edge, a couple cottonwood trees closer to the house, a maple tree near the driveway, and one lone oak tree near the road. Most of them were well-established, even if they weren't huge. But of course Heita would have chosen to climb and get stuck in the largest tree in her yard – a towering Ponderosa Pine.

Loki looked up, following her gaze. "I can… but there are far easier ways to retrieve her."

"Like what? I'm fresh out of a fire truck with an extension ladder."

"Magic, Jane." As if that was a perfectly logical explanation.

Still staring at the kitten well near lost in the mess of branches, she nodded thoughtfully before her mind screeched to a halt and she reached out to grasp his forearm. "You can't use magic." It was somewhat startling how easily she'd accepted his suggestion; clearly, her life was far past normal.

"Why not?" He was staring at her like she'd grown another head. "It would be the simplest way to get her."

"There are people across the street." She gestured to the workers. "You can't just poof up there, grab her, and poof back down." The papers would jump on that in an instant and then S.H.I.E.L.D. would get involved and yeah… not a good idea.

Loki looked mildly affronted at her generalization of his magic. "I do not _poof_."

But Jane waved off his vexation. "You know what I mean."

"I assure you, I do not." Turning from the tree, she faced him fully. He really did look offended. Having no magic of her own, how was she supposed to know that would bother him? Before she could amend her statement, though, he continued, looking only slightly less displeased. "Then I will conceal myself from their sight to get her."

"We can't do that either." He raised a brow in a silent inquiry. "How are we supposed to explain how Heita is, all of a sudden, not in the tree anymore?"

"Jane, you are being most difficult."

"No, I'm trying to keep people from figuring out that I'm living with an alien."

"That sounds incredibly degrading…"

But she ignored his annoyed look yet again. "Can you climb up there and get her or not?" She'd never been great at climbing trees. When she was six or seven, she'd fallen from one and proceeded to break her arm. It wasn't something she wanted to repeat, but there was no way she was going to leave Heita up there.

For a long time, Loki simply stared at her. It was only when she began to blush under his scrutiny that he issued a long-suffering sigh, turned on his heel, and walked to the tree. With one last glance, first to the men and then to her, he began to maneuver his way up. He made it look so easy, reaching for branch after branch and pulling himself up. When she thought about it, though, it was probably easy for someone with magical abilities and superhuman strength. His skills weren't always fair – especially that one time when she challenged him to an arm wrestling match; what a mistake – but she couldn't deny that they were convenient, at times.

She moved around the base of the tree to follow his movements through the branches and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw him reach Heita. Now holding the kitten, he was only able to use one hand on the descent. Even if he did fall, she knew he wouldn't be really hurt, but she couldn't help but nibble at her fingernails worriedly – a nervous habit from her childhood. It was only when he dropped from the last branch and was back on the ground that she felt better.

Curled into the bend of his arm, Heita appeared fine, if not a little haggard.

"Poor thing…" Jane reached out to take the kitten from Loki, but he pulled away at the last second. Frowning, she tried again only to receive the same result. "Stop it!" With one hand on her hip and the other extended outwards, she scolded him. "And let me see her."

"No."

That was unexpected.

Slowly, she blinked. "No?" His curt answer had brought her up short.

But Loki wasn't even looking at her. Instead, he cupped the back of Heita's head before rubbing his thumb against her cheek, lips quirking slightly at the corners as he did so. Then, he met her confused gaze with a completely serious one. "No."

"Can I ask why?"

Because what was currently happening wasn't making any sense. For someone that purportedly didn't care for the 'annoying feline', he was just a tad overprotective.

"You have proven yourself unfit to care for Heita…"

"What?" Her mouth moved, but nothing came out for a while as her mind struggled to catch up to the nonsense he'd just spouted. "You're the one that let her out of the house when you got the newspaper."

"… and I cannot trust you not to misplace her or sacrifice her to a wild animal on the way back to the house…"

"Are you _serious_?! Tell me you're joking…"

"… so I will keep hold of her until we are safely inside."

And then he was walking back towards the house. Stunned, yet fuming, Jane decided to forget every good thing she'd ever thought about him or said about him or even thought about saying about him. When he was halfway across the yard, he paused and looked back at her.

"Come along, Jane."

"You're ridiculous… you know that?"

She jogged to catch up to him and snuck a glance out of the corner of her eye. When she saw that he was still petting Heita with a small smile, her annoyance melted away, and she couldn't help but grin to herself.

"And you're not fooling anyone with your tough guy act. Heita's got you wrapped around her paw."

He didn't respond, but the minute the front door closed, Jane felt a hand on her arm only moments before her back was pressed to the wall. Instinctively, she tried to move away; however, there was no escape, hemmed as she was between the immovable wall and his immovable body. She looked up, staring at Loki with wide eyes.

"I would not demean myself to climbing a tree for merely anyone, Jane." And she absentmindedly wondered whether he was referring to Heita or to herself. He glanced down to the kitten that was now mewing in frustration, squished as she was between their bodies. "But I will admit that I am not… disinclined towards Heita."

It took a second, but when the words sunk in, she beamed. "Is that a roundabout way of saying you like her?" His eyes met hers briefly, and then he was gone, disappearing into the living room, still carrying Heita. And it wasn't until he was out of sight that she called out. "I knew it!"


	7. The Ties That Bind

A/N: This chapter sat partially completed for way too long, but I finally had a bit of inspiration to finish it. The muse does what it wants, much like Loki.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything having to do with Marvel Comics or any of its creations. I can only appreciate the characters they've given us to work with. I'll take credit for Heita, though.

* * *

**Of The Feline Persuasion**

**The Ties That Bind**

"_Loyalty is for the dogs. Count me among the cats. And count me twice – one for each of my faces."_

* * *

The basket of clothes and towels was cumbersome in Jane's hands as she made her way upstairs, and it wasn't the first time she wished that her washer and dryer were on the second floor of the house. She'd tripped more times than she cared to admit carrying loads of laundry up and down the staircase. This time, however, she was successful in making the trek. There was just the short hallway, second door on the right; and then, just as she was reaching out to open the bedroom door… she felt something slightly prickly and considerably unexpected beneath her foot.

Startled, she squeaked and jerked away. And true to form – because luck, it seemed, was never on her side – she lost her balance, careened backwards into the wall, and the basket that had been precariously balanced on her hip tipped over to scatter clothes everywhere. For a moment, she stood there and took in the explosion of fabrics. Then she picked up the offending item and, realizing what it was, headed downstairs to find its maker.

"Do you know what this is?"

Loki turned from the patio door and scanned her from head to toe before meeting her eyes. "I heard a noise upstairs. Are you well?"

Any other time, she would have been flattered by his concern. But not this time. No… this time he wouldn't throw her off with pleasing concern or charming smirks or pointed expressions because she was frustrated. So holding onto that resolve, she repeated the question insistently.

"Do you _know_ what this _is_?"

Loki frowned at her obvious displeasure, but his attention lowered to the item she held. "A crumpled piece of paper…" He answered slowly, as if unsure of whether it was a trick question or not.

"No, it's not." Immediately, his eyebrow arched and she acquiesced. "Ok, yes, it's a wad of paper… but do you know what _else_ this is?"

"The remains of a pointless article from one of your professional magazines."

"No, it's… wait, what?" Jane paused and unfurled the paper, and upon seeing that it was, in fact, something of hers, waved it at Loki. "You tore this out of my Scientific American magazine?" When he only pursed his lips in response, she asked again. "You _tore_ this out of _my_ Scientific American magazine, which I _haven't even read yet_?"

They stood there in silence while she tried to calm down. Judging by the look on Loki's face, he was genuinely confused by her mood and, knowing him, was probably chalking it up to the fact that she was mortal. Of course he wouldn't completely understand why she was upset, but after the years he'd spent with her, she would have thought he'd know it wasn't acceptable to just go around defacing other people's property. Even if it was just a magazine.

Then again, it was Loki she was talking about.

A tiny meow came from behind her, and Jane turned to see Heita walking up. She watched as the kitten – although she wasn't really a kitten anymore; more like the in-between stage between kitten and cat – came up to wind herself around Jane's ankles. The action did more to calm her down than any kind of rationalization.

"How about we make a deal…" She glanced back to Loki who was now looking at her thoughtfully. "I'll agree to ignore the fact that I now have to try and read this article around Heita's little teeth and claw marks if you agree to stop giving her so many things to play with."

"She needs some form of entertainment."

"Yes, but does she need five thousand forms scattered throughout the house?" Jane gestured around the living room. There were at least fourteen paper and foil balls, and that was just in one room and only included what she could see from where she stood. Who knew how many were hidden beneath the chair or behind the couch or under the bookshelves…

Loki gave her a condescending look. "You are being dramatic now, Jane."

"Even if I am, she still doesn't need more than a few toys." She sighed. "Just… cool it with the paper balls, alright? No more after this one."

As a peace offering of sorts, she crumpled the paper back up and tossed it. Heita immediately took off after the moving object. She batted it back and forth as she scrambled after it, and they watched her slide into the wall before weaving around the legs of the desk. Jane was smiling absentmindedly at Heita's antics when Loki spoke up.

"Why?"

The smile disappeared, and she groaned.

It was impossible for him to just agree to something without question, almost like cooperation defied the laws of his being.

"Because the house is being overrun with wads of paper." For the second time, she gestured to the balls littered around them. Could he not _see_ the mess? "And also because my sense of balance says so."

"I find it exceedingly amusing."

"Yeah, but you aren't the one tripping over them."

Jane vaguely wondered if perhaps Loki needed more 'toys' to play with. Maybe it was an obsessive compulsive thing he'd developed; like making hundreds of paper balls for Heita to play with had taken the place of the more… destructive tendencies he'd amused himself with in the past.

He paused for a moment. "I take it that is what happened upstairs."

With a relieved sigh, she breathed. "Yes." Finally, he seemed to be getting it. But then…

"The fact that you are clumsy is not my fault, Jane." A muscle began to twitch above her right eye while her expression darkened into a scowl. Heita darted between them, but while Loki's gaze lowered to follow her progress, Jane continued to glare at him. When he looked back to her, he gave a long-suffering sigh and relented. "If you truly wish me to cease making things for Heita's enjoyment…" Why did he have to make it sound like she was the bad guy? "I will."

"Ok, good." And then, as if she needed to say it one more time to convince herself she'd heard him correctly. "Good."

It felt like she'd won the battle, which only proceeded to make her doubtful because Loki never let her win… not really. Even when it seemed like she'd won, there was usually some hidden detail that twisted everything in his favor.

Without warning, Jane felt fur around her ankle, closely followed by the prick of teeth, and she looked down to see Heita playfully attacking her ankle. Carefully, she lifted her foot, shaking it slightly to pry away the paws. Heita came loose easily but didn't abandon her new plaything right away; she continued to lie on her back and stretch her paws up to Jane's dangling foot.

After a while, though, she did give up. Rolling to her feet, she crossed the room to sit in front of Loki – of course she wouldn't attack his ankles – who picked her up and began to scratch under her chin.

Content with the outcome, Jane turned to head back upstairs. All of the clothes still needed to be picked up, and by the time she put all of them away, another load would probably be ready. Her hand was on the railing and left foot on the first step when she heard him.

"I think you and I have come to an agreement of sorts."

The declaration brought her up short. Slowly, she rotated back. Loki had spoken softly, but it had been just loud enough to where she knew he'd meant for her to hear it.

Jane watched him continue to pet Heita, and although she had no idea what agreement he was referring to… "No, you haven't." Jane crossed her arms for good measure. "There will be no agreeing or scheming or planning with Heita in this house."

The way his lips curled into a small smirk made her inherently nervous.

"Loki…"

He stopped petting long enough to make an odd motion with his hand. There was a bit of green light, but whatever he'd conjured was fed to Heita before Jane could see what it was. But she knew.

"Did you just give her a treat?"

No response.

"You know, that's only encouraging that kind of behavior."

Still no response.

"Now she's going to attack my ankles all the time!"

And still no response.

"Loki!"

Finally, he met her eyes. "Our deal was for me not to make her any more toys. I accept your proposal; any disruptive acts Heita might commit other than that is beyond the scope of our arrangement. You said nothing about not urging her to assault your ankles."

Jane gaped at him, slack-jawed in a mixture of incredulity, confusion, and frustration. He'd won. Again. Damn it, he _always_ won. The subject of the discussion or the situation at hand didn't matter; he would find a loophole that would end up benefitting him.

With a groan, she turned and stomped up the stairs. She was stooped over picking up the clothes when she heard his voice call up to her. "I am willing to make an amendment to our deal, if you care to." But she just snorted in response and ignored him.

After two weeks of Heita jumping out from behind various pieces of furniture to attack her ankles and Jane trying not to accidentally step on the cat as she fumbled her way out of the assault, she was so exasperated that she agreed to amend the deal without even asking the terms.

* * *

Jane stretched, arms reaching above her head and toes pointing, before burrowing deeper into the warmth of the bed. The room was cold beyond the confines of the blankets, courtesy of an arctic front that had blown in the evening before. It would be miserable when she finally decided to get up, but until then, she'd enjoy snuggling under the comfortable weight of the covers.

And speaking of snuggling…

Eyes still closed, she rolled onto her side, unconsciously issuing a quiet sound of contentment as her arm searched for the God of Mischief that normally lay there. There was something incredibly comforting about curling up against his back… or his side… or any part of him, really. When her hand found nothing but the cold expanse of the bed, though, she frowned in confusion. Blearily, she opened her eyes and tried to read the digital time in the darkness. The blue numbers blurred together but cleared after she rubbed the sleepiness from her sight.

2:34

Too late for him to still be up – Loki had never been one to stay up into the late hours of the night – and too early for him to be awake, no matter how early of a riser he habitually was.

So where was he?

Throwing the covers aside, Jane shivered as she slipped on a pair of flannel pajama pants, her robe, and a set of thick, wool socks. Then, she opened the bedroom door and, after a quick glance up and down the hallway that revealed no sign of the man she sought, quietly made her way downstairs. It was when she stepped off the last stair that she heard it.

"… but he was unaware that it was merely a projection and fell into the molten stream after charging me."

A slash of light shone through the doorway to the kitchen, which was incidentally where Loki's voice was coming from as well. Slowly, she crossed the space until she stood next to the doorway. Holding her breath, she peeked around the doorframe… and what she saw instantly brought a grin to her face.

Seated on the floor on the far side of the kitchen with his back to the lower set of cabinets was Loki. He looked completely at ease with his legs stretched out and hands curled lightly in his lap as he talked. His head rested against the silverware drawer but was turned to the side and slightly down. And when her attention finally drifted from his form to follow his gaze, she noticed the bowl that sat beside him and the fluffy, bi-colored feline that was Heita gently lapping at its contents.

"He survived, though; fire giants are not susceptible to the magma of Muspelheim as other races are. So while he floundered in the lava, I located Thor and the Warriors Three and we returned to the Realm Eternal."

Loki, the eternal God of Mischief and Lies, was sitting on her kitchen floor in the middle of the night regaling Heita with stories as he fed her milk.

And if Jane hadn't thought that it was literally one of the most endearing things she'd ever seen, she would have snickered. Instead, she eased back around the corner before silently lowering herself to the floor. She mimicked his posture – back against the wall, legs extended out, head resting against the wall. The only difference was that she closed her eyes in preparation of listening him tell more stories.

"It was an excellent trick." He paused. "Speaking of tricks, we need to devise a new way for you to assail Jane."

At his words, her eyes flew open. Loki wasn't just regaling Heita with stories; he was sitting in the kitchen in the middle of the night earning her approval with milk while plotting against Jane. All thoughts of adorableness were dashed as she shook her head and buried her face in her hands. Damned Gods of Mischief…

"While amending the arrangement was enjoyable…" Jane couldn't quite fight the flush that crept up her neck, remembering the way she'd moaned his name even as she'd cursed him for always managing to get his way. "It also created the problem of us having to find a way around it. I told her that you would no longer attack her ankles while she walked around the house."

Jane said a silent thank you to whatever being could hear her.

"But I never said anything about while she slept."

The thank you slowly worked its way into something decidedly more profane. He wouldn't dare…

"Jane is notorious for moving her feet as she dreams."

Oh, no; he would.

"Might I suggest you go after them when she moves during the night?"

Later, when she silently made her way back upstairs to get some sleep before the new wave of assaults began and left her sleep-deprived, she made a mental note to set aside some time the next day to research the best ways of winning a battle of wills against a mischievous god.


End file.
